Stoner Moment #15 — Crumbs in the Couch

I vacuumed the couch. I did. And yet, reaching between the cushions, I find: seventeen crumbs, a Lego, a crayon, a sticky unknown object I'm choosing not to identify, and $1.35.

The couch is not furniture. It's an ecosystem.

After bedtime, exhale, feet up — ON the crumb couch, because it's mine after 8 PM — and I pocket the $1.35. Finders keepers. Mama tax.